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The Professionals

Grudge Match
Episode Guide
Meet The Capri
Agent Profiles

Fave guest characters

1)Murphy. Maybe we should have seen more of him?
2)Jax. Ditto. He seemed to have his head screwed on.
3)Benny. Only 3 appearances, but a popular guy-especially for a snout.

Fave bad guys

1)Franz Meyer. Leader of a German terrorist group, but sported a shockingly bad hairdo and unshaven 'bad guy look' mug.
2)Peter Crabbe. Willing to make himself look like he was blown up to fool the Mafia. What a psycho!
3)May Li. The worst hairdo in the world couldn't stop her from shooting at Doyle!

Fave cars

1)Bodie's silver Capri.
2)Doyle's X-Pack Capri with the big wheelarches.
3)Doyle's RS2000 Escort. The business. 25 years ago.

I think the reason the show works so well, apart from the chemistry between the 3 leads is that the stories are varied and the show as a whole is completely 'non-PC.' It's also not afraid to make fun of itself and it knows how preposterous it really is-and loves being it!
 What is that tune that's ALWAYS on radios, jukeboxes in virtually every ep? Who composed it? It's incredibly bad. How did it stay in the charts for 6 years?

Why won't Bodie EVER talk about his past? Especially Northern Ireland?

Why did Doyle go for the tight weave-wig look in season 4-5 when he went for the Kevin Keegan look in the early years? The weave-wig look is much better than the Keegan look.

Why does Cowley's limp seem to move legs, and then disappear altogether?

Doyle's feet are a size bigger than Bodie's yet Bodie is at least 2 inches taller.

Cowley is multi-lingual. I suppose he has to be given his job! You know what they say about cunning linguists......

Doyle falls for The Bird Of The Week. Bodie just shags The Bird Of The Week.

Is it me or does Doyle move house every 3 weeks?

Bodie gets rid of the sharp suits he wears in Series 1 and goes for an awful brown cardigan and an even worse gross grey leather jacket for Series 2 onwards. WHY????

Another thing I like about the show is the inventiveness of the stories and the way the writers make the characters seem so real. Part of this is down to the great acting of course, but these guys almost seem like real people. Bodie and Doyle are believeable, intelligent, forthright and very enjoyable to watch.

None of them seem able to hold on to their women. Even Cowley got ditched by Annie The Evangelist!

A lot of the plots in the series are lifted out of 'real life.' For instance the Meyer-Helmut group in Close Quarters is clearly based on the Baader-Meinhoff group that was active in the 70's. Also a lot of the social problems dealt with in the series are still ongoing today. Funny that, about what goes around comes around.
The New Professionals
I decided to watch the new one when it began airing on Sky 1 in 1999. I'd not seen the original yet but I was hoping that after the good stories I'd heard about it would somehow make the new one as good.
 Quite honestly I'd rather watch Dempsey and Makepeace again..... C I 5 is global and is headed by The Equaliser-sorry Edward Woodward playing a weak-arsed wishy washy boss named Malone and has 2 plank acting disaster areas named Curtis and Backus (who is female) and a fairly promising American guy named Keel. After about 20 minutes the TV went off because it was just so terrible I couldn't stand to watch any more.
When I first watched the original I was a bit apprehensive of watching it on the strength that the remake was so crap! I'm glad I sat down and watched. Bodie and Doyle would tear through this new C I 5 like a hot knife through butter and although Bodie would probably end up shagging Backus, he'd ditch her immediately for a girl with half a brain. Oh, and Cowley would eat Malone alive.
The only thing I can say is what a shame Keel wasn't in the original as a sort of Murphy character, as his was the only character that worked. I forced myself to watch all 13 episodes and half the time i found myself looking at the clock wondering if this week's turgid pile of bollocks was ever going to end. What a shame that such a legendary show as The Profs got such a bad 'PC' follow up.


10 Reasons why Bodie is better than Doyle

10) You know where you stand with Bodie
9) Bodie has wit, charm and personality plus
8) Bodie's Capri is a better colour than Doyle's
7) Bodie pulls well fit birds
6) Bodie doesn't have a dodgy perm or a big gold medallion
5) Bodie can beat the crap out of anyone in 2 seconds flat
4) Bodie doesn't look like his jeans are about to rip open because they're too small for him
3) Three words: Flying Leg Kick
2) Bodie only gets angry for a reason. Doyle just flies off the handle
1) 1 word. BALLS!

And vice versa

10) Doyle pulls well fit birds but doesn't need us to know this
9) Doyle likes to think things through before breaking a few bones
8) Doyle's RS2000 KICKS ARSE!
7) Doyle likes to tell people how he feels
6) Doyle doesn't use Hai Karate
5) Doyle doesn't look like he had his hair cut with paper scissors
4) Doyle doesn't wear a manky grey leather jacket
3) Three words: Running up stairs
2) Doyle likes restoring motorbikes
1) Doyle gets results. Bodie just wastes people

My 10 fave episodes
1) Close Quarters
2) Hunter/Hunted
3) Discovered In A Graveyard
4) Klansmen
5) Wild Justice
6) Mixed Doubles
7) Man Without A Past
8) First Night
9) Spy Probe
10) A Stirring Of Dust

Best quotes from the show

''I can't leave you alone for a minute can I?'' ''Someone just tried to kill me.'' ''Really? I thought they hated the car!''

''The hero had an operation to take his hand off his hip!''

''Just cuz you forgot to bring ya vitimins!''

''You mean to tell me if the bird was posing nude with an apple you'd paint the apple?!''

''Doesn't she know that your night out extends to 2 hotdogs in the back of the Odeon?''

''You'd have to be mad in this job or you'd go insane.''

''I want a lawyer.'' ''Why son? D'Ya want to make a will?''

''What do you know about Greeks, Bodie?'' ''The fellas dance together and the cops all shave their heads!''

''How do you feel about terrorists?'' ''Shoot the bloody lot of them!'' ''Queers?'' ''Shoot the bloody... ha ha.''

(Referring to a Chinese man) ''Just to confirm your order's been filled, sir. One Chinese Takeaway.'' ''With lots of rice?''

''All birds are nice birds. So long as they're under 50, still warm and come across.''

Pros - Why Is It Still Loved? by Ellie Carley

In my opinion it is virtually impossible to answer that question. When I sit down today, to watch a show that ended its run twenty three days before I was born, I can't help but think that this show has something very special about it and I'm not just talking about a Mr Lewis Collins!


So what is it? For me, it's nostalgic. I love watching the old cars, seeing the old fashions of the time, watching what happens in the background, how people react to the cameras being there. And watching Martin and Lewis laughing and larking about is so joyful! I'm so glad that The Professionals was made with Martin Shaw and Lewis Collins. Jon Finch as Raymond Doyle? I can't imagine that Jon Finch would have considered a bubble perm and I can't imagine Doyle without one now. Can you even begin to imagine Anthony "Brideshead Revisited Teddy Bear Holding" Andrews as a ruthless mercenary type? Anthony Andrews as our Bodie? Shudder...... If you haven't guessed already I'm a die-hard BodieBabe. Friends can't get their heads round my love and fascination for the show and Lewis. My dad can't and he was around in the seventies and he and my mum enjoyed Pros immensely as in Mum's own words:" It was gritty and up to the minute". Quite a strange thought that, that Bodie with his close cropped hair and delicious brown cardigan and Doyle with his unmistakable bubble perm and plaid jacket were up to the minute!


The show was groundbreaking in that it dealt with real social issues that were causing concern at the time. Other shows that were on were entertaining but unbelievable. Eps that stick out as dealing with real life are Klansmen, Mickey Hamilton, Female Factor and The Acorn Syndrome. I particularly remember Doyle talking about the States having guard dogs and electrified fences and he comments on how long it will take for the UK to need that type of security. And again in Mickey Hamilton, Doyle tells Mickey that there aren't ENOUGH doctors and that was back in ' 78. Things haven't changed that much with the NHS have they?


Coming back to Martin and Lewis and their characters, Bodie and Doyle are kept in line(sort of) by their boss George Cowley played by the late Gordon Jackson,who I think was made for the part. He had a gruff, rough side but could show empathy and gentleness. I have always felt that the character of Cowley looked upon his two best agents as sons that he never had. The three of them worked so well together that they are all splendid to watch on screen. These three actors make you believe that their characters are real, living breathing people and that CI5 is out there clearing the streets of criminals and corruption and trying "to keep this island smelling ever so faintly of roses".


One of the best parts of this fandom is visiting locations. One of the girls on one of the lists described visiting Doyle's Camden "Hunter/Hunted" flat as like visiting a holy shrine! I agree completely with that, as we've enjoyed these eps so much that visiting the real sites are fantastic! It's crazy that an ordinary flat in Camden can mean so much to us because its a former Pros location but they do. When I first visited the flat, I was in complete awe. Martin and Lewis had actually walked around the path round here, touched the door handle, parked their cars on THAT bit of tarmac....I see a nice man coming towards me with a needle...

Recently a bunch of us girls visited the seige cul-de-sac from The Acorn Syndrome and one of the girls (bless her, she knows who she is!) bought her laptop and we all crowded round to watch the seige scenes in the real place, it was surreal! But we were all so chuffed that we were in this place, a cul-de-sac in Watford. A place that to anyone else would be insignificant but not to us! And that is why I love the fandom so much as it has given me to chance to meet like minded people who appreciate the show (and Lew!) as much as I do and I find that the best thing of all.


Eleanor Carley